football is the last great american vice

Illustration for deadspin

“You shouldn’t like football. I shouldn’t like football. Shit man, the league gives you every excuse they can to tune out. They had to have multiple committee meetings just to define a fucking catch.

“And yet, they still prosper. That’s because football has become the most visible and lucrative of forbidden fruits. The deadliest sin. I’m not strong enough to resist its odd temptations. Come tonight, I’ll be in my recliner, watching two teams I don’t like, shushing my kids so that I can enjoy the game in silence, manufacturing a solitude that I already know I neither need nor want.”